Starting Sixth Form | My Honest Thoughts

25 August 2020

After having nearly half a year off school, the thought of going back to 'normal' life, a busy schedule and a work load is more than daunting to me. Whilst being in lockdown was not always the most fun, I have loved and embraced being in the comfort of my own home. I must admit, I have been out a lot more since lockdown restrictions eased and seen my friends (safely and following social distancing guidelines) but going back to school is a bit more of a step. Especially as I'm starting a completely new school with barely anyone I know, essentially a new chapter of my life whilst still in a global pandemic. The normal little 'Sunday night back to school' nerves have kicked in early with a bit more weight added to them this time. I'm sure a lot of you reading this can relate to what I'm typing right now and also, anyone that's already been to sixth form, can you enlighten me or give me any tips please?

Receiving my GCSE results last week was such a surreal experience for me. After not doing my exams and finishing high school in March, I'd been thinking about that day for such a long time. Even longer than that, probably when I first knew about results day after seeing my sisters go through it! So you could say, I put myself under a lot of pressure. Whether that's a good or bad thing I don't know but I've always been one to hold myself to a high standard, even down to getting disheartened if I answered a maths question wrong. Over time, I've gradually learnt that making mistakes is okay and actually even better than getting everything right but GCSEs were always a big thing for me. I can remember my stomach churning at pathways evening and my hands shaking in the exam hall every time I walked in. To not be  all doom and gloom, it did get better and after many mocks, I was fine and it didn't faze me. 
As you can gather, I was very nervous about results day! I think mostly about the event as a whole and the feeling of having that envelope in your hands right before you open it. Luckily, I was completely over the moon with what I achieved so I was so relieved and pleased! 

Pretty soon after that I enrolled into my Sixth Form and confirmed my place. I'm not sure why I'm worrying so much when I know I've been excited to go to Sixth Form for years. (Maybe don't ask me if I still find it exciting when I'm snowed under with work in a few months time!) But to be doing my favourite subjects (photography, media studies and English language), surrounded by people that are also just as passionate about them as me is what I can't wait for. 

As well as starting a new chapter in my life that's scary in itself, I've now also got the worries of still being in a global pandemic. Will I have to wear a mask? What if I get it, have to self isolate and miss school again? What if we go into a second lockdown? And those are just a few! As much as I worry and overthink, it's comforting to know that I'm not alone in this situation and everyone is in the same boat. It's easy for me to say that everything happens for a reason and to take each day as it comes but those sayings are so true.

So, if you're feeling a bit like me, worried about going back to school, starting sixthform/uni or snapping back to reality, it's completely okay to have those feelings. Don't fight them but don't get too worked up about it, it's not worth it! And chat to people, talk about it with your friends and family - don't let your worries eat you up. 

Bethan xx

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