2023: Going in with no resolutions?

11 January 2023

Hello hello hello. Happy New Year! Shout out to those who think 3 years ago was 2017 and not 2020, because that is certainly where my head is at right now. 

New Years Eve is definitely like marmite, you either hate it or love it. I've gone through patches of liking it, probably when I was younger and the excitement of being in double digits in 2013 was the one of the only thoughts on my mind. Fast forward to now and I am not liking how I'm going to turn 20 this year, I would quite like time to stop. 

New years can sometimes not be so exciting if you're a bit confused about life; suddenly there is a whole year ahead of you and everything looks a bit uncertain. And for the anxious person that can't think too far into the future and likes to break things into small sections whilst everyone around you is posting what their goals are for the next year when it's hard for you to think about the next week. If that's you, that's also me and this post may be a bit of help. 

I used to LOVE making resolutions and think about New Year as a time to reinvent myself and list the most unrealistic goals which would result in self sabotage when I hadn't started them by January 3rd. I wasn't going to be reading a book a week that's for sure. 

I still love a goal, love a list and love pushing myself and while January is a good time for a fresh start, there were other lessons I had to learn too. 

January isn't the only time to start again, to do something you've always wanted to do or write a list of goals. You can have a fresh start in February, June or even the 15th December, in fact every day is a chance to start over again if you need. January 1st is just a day in the calendar and sometimes that is enough to think about, another day to survive and get through is just a significant goal in itself. 

If it gets to the 3rd January and nothing has been ticked yet, it is definitely not the end of the world. And if I'm being completely honest, this is something I'm learning to deal with now. There is such a thing as starting again and not feeling like you've failed. These goals have been set by yourself, not a member of authority, and when the negative voice in your brain starts... would you speak to your best friend like that? 

So with my previous unhealthy relationship with resolutions, I decided that going into 2023, I wasn't going to make any and treat the new year or January as any other ordinary month. 

But this didn't help my overactive, anxious brain; I needed some clarity on what the year might hold. I naturally had goals floating around in my head because of the type of person I am and influenced by the media being about the New Year and starting 'afresh'. 

I still didn't want to make any resolutions but I had to do something about it, and a brain dump is always the answer when my mind is feeling busy. 

I got a blank piece of paper and let my mind transfer. It mostly included things I wanted to continue doing this year, one thing I wanted to learn/improve and affirmations to focus on. There are always things you're going to strive to do New Years or not; to improve your career, better your mind, do more of things and less of others. Everything I noted was achievable as it was something I already do or is easy to integrate into my life and there is no time limit to these things, I have a whole year. 

I am now opposed to big and out of reach resolutions that aren't good for my self esteem but what I am a fan of, is individual tiny goals that will eventually lead to big goals being achieved without focusing directly on them. 

For some people, January is a huge month to kick start the year but it's completely okay and more up my street to ease myself into the new year with a slow month as it can be a difficult period of the year. It can be a time to focus on well-being, getting outside, reading or watching that new TV series (Emily in Paris and Waterloo Road, polar opposties but both great) when you feel like it to relax your mind, practicing breath work and gratitude and prioritising YOU. 

If there was one intention I would pick for myself and us all for the new year ahead and more, would be to be more kind to ourselves. 

Bethan xx

Latest Instagrams

© Bethan May. Design by Saroya.